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PERSONALIZING FUNERAL PRODUCTS BEYOND CASKETS
When it comes to personalizing funeral products to reflect the life of a loved one, there seems to be an endless supply of options – from themed casket corners to embroidered casket cap panels. At times, it seems there are more personalization options than casket models. But where is it written that product personalization is the exclusive domain of caskets companies? Who says that only caskets can be customized? But let’s hold off debating this concept until later in the article. Let’s first discuss the importance of personalization.
It’s unreasonable to expect every family that plans a funeral with your firm to have the necessary knowledge to understand fully what memorialization products and services are available from your firm. On average, people plan or arrange funerals once every decade, so it’s rare to encounter a family who has recently planned or played an active role in a funeral.
However, you are doing the family and your firm a disservice if you don’t make the effort to explain all the service and memorialization options. And the best way to do this is to discuss this topic during the arrangement conference.
To begin the conversation, it may make sense to remind the family why memorializing their loved ones is important. As humans are wired for connection, memorialization provides a crucial link between our past, present-day reality, and future expectations. Memorialization helps nourish hope amidst despair. Here are three reasons why your families need to remember a loved one:
1) HONORING THE DECEASED
Being mindful of the importance and value brought into life by those who have been lost, families may feel an innate desire to honor a loved one’s memory. This urge is far from a new phenomenon; humans have honored deceased loved ones throughout history.
Consider ancient monuments like the Egyptian pyramids or memorials such as Ground Zero in New York City. All of these were built for remembrance. This desire to remember manifests itself on smaller scales, too, such as crosses marking unfortunate deaths by highways, cherished toys left atop children’s graves, and spontaneous shrines at locations of tragic events. These are signs of the collective need to remember and connect with departed souls who made an impact during a lifetime.
2) MOVING TOWARDS CLOSURE
An integral step in a person’s journey toward closure involves finding a personal way to commemorate the lost one. Remembering their unique attributes can guide this process. Memories are precious and worth honoring in a memorial. The creation of such tribute results from careful planning that deeply engages loved ones’ personalities in its design concept. Not only does it reflect their life, but it also provides the family with control over how the narrative will end. This is essential in arriving at acceptance and is a major factor in finding closure.
Hence, designing memorials tailored to a family’s loved ones becomes much more than just setting up physical reminders: they become symbolic bridges between past fondness and present acceptance, signifying the start of reconciling with grief while fostering hope for a better tomorrow.
3) CELEBRATING A LIFE WELL-LIVED
Navigating through the stages of grief can be tricky. Families may sometimes feel lost or confused about how to copewith their emotions, but that’s perfectly normal during this challenging time. One key way to begin to heal is by celebrating and honoring the life of a departed loved one. That’s why families create memorials as part of this process. Memorials allow families to connect deeply with their feelings while reflecting on cherished memories they hold dear.
Memorials act as symbolic bridges between the past and present. Ultimately, memorialization fosters healing during grief. When families honor their loved ones with funeral services, it validates their life’s value. It helps them express pain healthily while still feeling connected to it. Remembering those who have left us promotes acceptance of the loss over time, enabling smoother emotional recovery.
VAULTS IN THE PERSONALIZATION EQUATION
Now that we’ve discussed why personalization is important, let’s return to the debate about casket personalization versus vault personalization. Given that personalization of funeral services and merchandise has been around for a while, why is it so often not utilized, especially as it relates to the vault? There are several reasons – from just going through the motions of asking, to unawareness of what can be done to transform something from functional to meaningful.
Perhaps there is no product to which these circumstances more than the burial vault. Personalizing a burial vault is still a foreign concept to many funeral professionals, let alone families. While more families are being offered burial vault personalization by funeral professionals who have witnessed the impact it can make, many families remain unaware that it is available. And yet when they are presented with personalization options, a good percentage select it. After all, today’s consumers seek out distinctive experiences and reject ordinary products or services…why would that be any different when it comes to funeral selections made for a loved one
As funeral professionals, we need to do more to raise the awareness of burial and urn vault personalization and it begins with vault providers providing funeral homes with tools that better explain and visually show what can be done. Traditional visual aids such as wall graphics, table signs, brochures, and printed presentation materials can showcase the array of meaningful images that are available along with some examples of loved ones’ photos, names, dates, and even collages that can be done to commemorate a singular life.
To show families what is possible, consider creating a “brag book” – a photo album with pictures of the memorialization products and unique services in which your firm has played a role - how your firm has personalized vaults for families or how families have incorporated these customized vaults into the services that were conducted. This provides families with
what we call “permission to believe” these things are possible.
In addition to simple unawareness by families, funeral professionals may face other hurdles in offering personalization of burial vaults or urn vaults. One is not knowing whether their burial vault company is even able to customize a carapace or whether a short turnaround requirement can be met. Advancements have made large-format printing more accessible for vault providers, giving them the ability to produce carapace prints in an expedited manner.
Another hurdle that not only applies to offering families personalized vault options but is prevalent across other services and products is the perception of the funeral director being “pushy”. But remember, a funeral director is precisely that: directing and guiding families through their options. If funeral professionals don’t educate families on what is possible, how will they ever know? It may make sense to keep in mind the axiom – “Tell, don’t sell”. You may be surprised by the decisions informed families make.
While options differ from one vault provider to another, vault personalization can be categorized into four broad areas. The simplest are nameplates or plaques, engraved with names and dates, which are affixed to the vault. The approximate size of these is 8” x 12”. A second method is the use of metal or resin emblems that reflect a loved one’s religion, military service, or other passions. Vinyl decals can be added that allow families to include meaningful words or a defining image on the burial vault carapace.
Finally, funeral professionals can offer families the ultimate in capturing and displaying the essence of their loved one. Photographs or other color images can be selected by the family to create a one-of-a-kind montage. The unique, totally personalized image is then applied to the cover of the vault for display at the graveside service. The approximate size of
this mosaic which cover the carapace is 18” x 75”.
There’s one additional way that funeral directors can enhance the cemetery committal service with just a Sharpie® permanent marker. Vaults that feature a smooth carapace, such as the Doric Elysian™ model, make a perfect canvas for family and friends to add messages and words of love. To a lesser degree, the same “ceremony” can be done with urn vaults before the committal.
Dr. Alan Wolfelt likes to use the term “memory picture” to describe the importance of seeing a loved one for the last
time at the visitation service at the funeral home. Personalizing the vault can provide a memory picture of a loved one’s
life at the committal service at the cemetery – and thereby become a final reflection of a life well lived.
Doric Products, Inc. is a leading manufacturer of burial vaults,
cremation vaults, and memorialization products. Distributed by highly
trained professionals throughout the United States and Canada, Doric
offers burial vaults of exceptional quality, value, and strength. Although
Doric is best known as a leader in traditional concrete burial vaults, the
Classic Metal Vaults division features one of the largest selections of
air-seal metal vaults available anywhere.
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